


Falling For U

by worstgirl



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: And angst, F/M, Fluff, Heartache, M/M, Mentions of Anxiety, Okay this is so self indulgent, Pining Michael, but for once im Michael, flangst, i was listening to the song by peachy! This whole time, loving your best friend, stagedorks is canon, this isnt a vent fic wdym
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-29
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-08-09 10:18:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16447991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/worstgirl/pseuds/worstgirl
Summary: But I can’t help itI'm falling for youAnd I can’t quit itCause I'm stuck on you~~~or, michael is a pining gay mess but he doesn’t care as long as his best friend is happy





	Falling For U

It’s funny how fast someone can go from your best friend to a crush. Michael knows that better than anyone. He’s known Jeremy for ages, as long back as he could remember. It wasn’t until seventh grade that everything started to change for him.

 

The first day he’d walked into his homeroom class and Jeremy was already there. Michael hadn’t seen him since the week before, since his moms always took him on vacation and school shopping then, but somehow in that week Jeremy had gotten cute. He looked as nervous as ever, face red and bouncing on the balls of his feet. He wore a too-big blue cardigan and a Star Wars t-shirt. Michael was suddenly very, very aware of the slope of his forehead to his nose to his lips, somehow angular and soft all at once. 

 

Then Jeremy noticed him and he lit up, almost literally. A grin spread across his face and his eyes sparkled, and Michael felt his heart drop to his stomach. He’d never felt anything like this before. He could only stare, a small grin on his own face, making his way over to his best friend of eight years. “Hey, Jer.” He said, nudging the other boy’s side, wondering why his stomach felt like a million butterflies had been released in it. 

 

“Micha, oh my god, I missed you.” Jeremy had been a lot easier with touching him then, slinging his arm around Michael’s shoulder, and Michael felt like his heart was fucking melting. God, what was going on? Why did his best friend make him feel this way? He didn’t mind all that much, he was just thoroughly confused. Since when did his pulse seem to skyrocket whenever Jeremy gave him a smile, or turned to him in class, or brushed hands. 

 

That summer contained one of the best nights of Michael’s life. He’d gotten dragged by Jeremy to a Weird Al concert. Objectively the worst possible choice for Jeremy’s first concert, but Michael was fine if it meant he got to spend more time with Jeremy. He’d figured out what was going on, mostly. Why Jeremy made him feel giddy and happy. 

 

Michael Mell had a crush on his best friend. He wondered what he’d done to get a crush on his ridiculously cute, out of his league,  _ straight  _ best friend. The world must hate him. Or it just liked making him sit on his bed with his headphones on, listening to sappy love songs and waiting for Jeremy to text him back- which he always did, with proper grammar and everything. 

 

But that didn’t help him at all, that realization, not least of when Jeremy’s hand linked with his, pulling him into the crowd of people. Jeremy’s hand was smaller than his, thinner, colder. He’d always teased Jeremy for his cold hands, but right then, it felt awesome. The concert smelt slightly of weed, and sweat, and he could hear people singing along to the music, Jeremy included. He hadn’t imagined he would like concerts, with his anxiety and all, but he seemed to blend into the crowd.

 

Fast forward to freshman year, in the middle of winter. They’d just been hit by a massive snowstorm, covering the sidewalks with three feet of snow at least. Jeremy’s face is pink, his nose especially, considering that his coat was thinner than the weather dictated. “Dude, don’t you have a better coat? It’s the middle of winter!” 

 

“M-Mom h-hasn’t gotten m-m-me a new one y-yet-“ Jeremy said, his teeth chattering. Michael made a mental note to either talk to his moms or just give Jeremy one of his old coats. He’d look cute in one, considering Michael was taller and wider than his stick of a friend. Michael killed that thought- no best friend pining for him right then. They entered the 7-11, and Jeremy let out a sigh of relief at the sudden flow of warmth. Michael noticed the way his shoulders relaxed, his muscles got less tense. He gave a small smile. 

 

“C’mon, man, let’s get something warm.” He said, then looked down at Jeremy’s hands that he’d just pulled out of his gloves- they were pale and shaking, the tips red. “Jer! You’re freezing!” Michael did the first thing that came to his head, grabbing Jeremy’s hands in his and holding them, doing his best to warm them. If not for the thin gloves between them, they would be skin-on-skin. Michael tried not to fixate too much on that, too worried for his obviously freezing cold friend. He glanced up and entertained the thought, for a second, that Jeremy’s red cheeks were because of their almost contact. But there wasn’t the sparkle in his eyes that was there whenever he talked about the wonderful Christine Canigula.

 

Like he is doing now. The boys are in Michael’s basement, the faint scent of weed permeating the air surrounding them. Jeremy’s chatter is so proud, so happy. “And I got her to agree to a second date, Micha, isn’t that great?” He says, his voice chipper.

 

Michael has to admit that Jeremy does look happier. He looks cuter when he’s excited about something, and he’s definitely excited now. Old fashioned Space Invaders is on the screen, and Michael remembers their first time playing it- Jeremy held his controller upside down, and was complaining about why he was doing so badly. Michael’s eyes trail up from Jeremy’s hands on the joystick to the angle of his jaw. Jeremy has a million freckles scattered across his cheeks, and Michael remembers tracing his pen along them to connect them while he was high, making constellations and naming each one. 

 

Jeremy looks so happy, talking on and on about the cute Asian girl with the colourful dresses and bright smiles and adorable personality and bubbly attitude and gorgeous eyes (that last one was all Jeremy). Michael can’t even bring himself to hate her, really. She makes Jeremy so happy, she makes his eyes sparkle and his lips curl into a soft smile whenever he hears her name. 

 

Michael wants Jeremy to be happy. He may want Jeremy to be happy with him, but he knows that’s impossible, so he contents himself with knowing that someone is taking care of him, and tries to ignore the ache in his chest with how he has to act. Because even after everything that’s happened, everything Jeremy’s done and everything Michael’s done and everything the Squip has done, Michael still wants his best friend to be happy. And if it’s not with him? 

 

So be it. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hahahahaha percy totally isnt having a pining gay crisis over her best friend what are you talking about thats ridiculous
> 
> Also follow me on tumblr at @ player-two-heere
> 
> Stay safe, and stay wonderful loves!!  
> ~PlayerTwoHeere


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